#139

Slap me and wake me up.
I couldn't imagine how such a short journey could caused such huge impact, and I still can't understand it.
A short journey, yet a far one.
I've never thought I would ever fall into this kinda trap.

Going through this mental turmoil is definitely not fun.
True as it is, I guess I've been fooling myself into thinking that I'm alright.
That I'm up and tall on my own two feet.
Like the darling said, I've buried it so deep that I forgot about its existence.
As much as I want to grief over it, I just can't get myself to do it.
The darling said I've been strong for too long I've forgotten how it feels like to have tears rolling down.
I guess I've bottled this emotion up too much.

But meeting someone who resembles u so much in person really just push me into this deep dilemma.
I wish I could let u know that I miss u.
But truth is, it's not as easy as picking up the phone and calling the other side of the handset.

It's hard to wait for something u know might never happen, but it's harder to give up when u know it's everything you've ever wanted.
But when you're non-existent, the hope is also non-existent and I guess the only thing to do is to walk away from this pain.

But the question now is, how and where do I start, again?